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Gazelle Observations

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Old July 7th 03, 11:17 AM
Screachy Preachy
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Default Gazelle Observations

Still watching Gazelle infomercials.

Don't know why--maybe since my libido is pert near zero these days
(what with NYC heat and kidney stones, fer chrissakes), I guess the only
way to indulge my perversions is with this genre of mis-infomercials.

Here's what I just realized:

Most of you know that the "new" Gazelle comes fitted with "power
rod pistons", which create a pneumatic-type resistance to the
stride--all well and good: this makes an utterly useless machine
somewhat less useless.

But here's the rub--or lack thereof:
As best as I can scrutinize this 'mercial, without slow motion
and without particularly good eyesight, not a *single* frame in the
whole frenetic 'mercial showed the power rod set to even its first level
of resistance!!! Wow!

Now, why would this be?? Why wouldn't he show off the power rod

Because, the motion is *fundamentally untenable* to all users
except for possibly swimmers (their kick), and snow-bound skiiers
slogging up hill. The only way to comfortably/practically use the
machine is in its *frictionless state*, for 99.9% of all users. And
then, with near-zero benefit. In fact, there is no machine on the
market, retail or commercial (that I know of), that exercises the legs
resistively in that motion.
Nearly *every* point Tony makes, about anatomy, muscle
involvement, HR, etc. is incorrect. The details would make this post
more insufferably long than usual, so if you gots questions, post'em.

But, if'n you read the reviews at the sites in Cardone's post on
the Total Gym, people love the Gazelle! Wow... I gotta give Penn &
Teller a call, see what they have to say.
Garden hose water, anyone? $7, please...
Kristofer Hogg, ms, rd
HoloBarre Rehab/Fitness/Stretching Systems, Yonkers, NY
to email: Remove the numeric value of pi in my address

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